my mind reflection !

had a great time back there , got to know a new friend, went to some cool places & experienced again the flood of uncontrolled past memory :|

whenever I was back there, don't know why but there was a kind of feeling that make me feel stressed.

Was it because of what was happening over there, about family, about life or simply because of me ?

Random thoughts flashed in my mind here & there, I thought I already forgot all of them but suddenly all that memory was once again played back. something that even my logical mind could also not control it, so in the end I let it be, let it play & let it run wildly in my mind, again and once again


memory once again was being flashed but it was not because of any particular person, wasn't it ?

last hour when i was there, i managed to make a last phone call to someone, out of my surprise that person picked up the phone . and then we talked for like more than half an hour, we both understand what the other wanted to say or would like to hear, but neither one of us said it out first, or we refused the last opportunity which was given to us.

let it be !  Like what i said , "what will be will be "

" life is not a stage so don't need to wear your mask and perform to anyone. be yourself and do whatever you want. etc etc "  I still remember i told u all these things , actually did not know the reason why i told u so haizz

let just be friend for now, I don't want to think too much , for such a long time, I don't really put my trust in all kind of relationship ( of course there are some exceptions ). It's not that I'm not a committed type of person, it's because I haven't found the right person so that I could share everything with .

One of my friend ever told me the last time when i met her there, she said no matter how successful in life I could be, behind all that glory, I would still need a family so that I could know where to come back, where to spend my life with & thus, it would make my life complete.

I felt so touched when i heard what she told me, yes she got the point. But in order to make it happen, it requires tones of effort & overflowing love to maintain that love relationship. Am I ready to commit myself & be serious in a relationship ? The answer is I still Don't Know

You have your life over there, which I can't imagine how tough it could be and I also have my life over here, which you again also don't know what I might be through .

Each of us has our own things that we Have to do in life, everyday seems like a mundane routine, where we might repeat something unconsciously, yet we have to do it anyway . Isn't it boring ?

For you, you and you ( etc) I wish you all the best and do whatever you feel right in your life, because after all that is your life, which I could only be a viewer, a stranger, a supporter in a sense,  a friend ( perhaps) and nothing else. vice versa, it goes the same thing for you.

Be my stranger, be my friend, be my love, be my family or be my nothing. It's up to you and to me to work it out !