whenever I am feeling down, listening to some emotional songs would be the best deal for me.

a lot of unwanted/ unexpected things have been happening which made me feel so sian, stressed and depressed recently.

is it right to say that the peak of this year was over, and now it is the time to experience your own downturn :(

day by day, accumulated unwanted/ unhappy things keep occurring continuously, which I'm here striving hard to overcome it little by little till it really strains me out

I'm out of breadth, i'm out of energy - just to realize that I'm not that strong as I ever thought so.

Striving to do things little by little - even though when one unwanted thing happens, it could waste away all my little effort - then the question is what am I striving for ? the result would still be a "No" anyway.

Everyone knows that nobody could always maintain or stay forever at the peak, it would be a time for you to come down, so that others could shine. and yes, here I'm sobbing over my little failure/ downturn. How pathetic I am !

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" We have nothing to hold back there ."

Your words keep echoing in my mind. Yet you are right. I sincerely hope that your application goes well, so that you could get rid of this kind of life which you have been suffering for years. No one can guarantee a better one over there, but perhaps you deserve to have something new in your life. To refresh, to turn over a new leaf, to start all over again, to experience new things .

A bit puzzling when you said my life over here was fast, thus why I was like being flooded/ flown away with my hectic life. However I am not really sure what you said was right or not.

different countries, different place and thus, different life style, different pace. If I were you , I would have love your life style, instead of my own one then. I do feel that my life pace now is fast, but somehow it seems not fast enough to really flood me away to everything. I'm actively forcing myself to be busy, to be involved in so many things. The funny thing is that I even don't know the real reason why I do so. All I want is to make my life turn worse, depressing. and then when I achieve it, I could go crazy and feel depressed about it. How crazy I am .

haizz, enough for kidding and fooling around. back to serious, I want to be more busy, more "no-life" life .. for what - what for - I also do not know. Let's see and wait till my breaking down point. I doubt this day would be far away !